The One and Only Caption Contest (tm)

[PoofBird]

News
From now on (1-1-2004) you can win rupies in this contest!
1st place gets 150 rupies
2nd place gets 100
3rd place gets 50


Welcome, my forum brothers and sisters.

To many of you, this thread is an old friend, to others it is a new acquaintance, soon to be a valued member of the family.

It is the Caption Contest.

I post a pic, you think of a funny line.

Here are the rules:

1. Make a caption for the pic, and make it funny!
2. Only two captions per person can join the contest. You can post more, because the whole point is to have fun. If you post a 3rd or 4th caption, please state immediately which two will go in the contest.
3. Only I post new pics. If you have ideas for new pics, give me a PM
4. I am at libery to change rules as I see fit. Questions, suggestions and complaints go to me by PM
5. Photoshopping the pic is not allowed, except for speech-balloons or lines of text.
6. The winner gets 3 :weebl: , the runner-up gets 2 :weebl:, and number 3 gets 1 :weebl:
7. No :weebl: can be won by sucking up or giving me tips, ideas etc.
8. Winners are anounced within reasonable time, afterwards a new pic is posted.
9. Winners are not to be discussed in this thread (at least, not in great length). this thread is for captions, you can take the smalltalk elsewhere.
10. If for some reason, the next pic or the winner isn't on time, don't cry and yell. There's probably a good reason, like yours truly having a 3D life.
11. Old http://twc.sshunet.nl/~djstronk/smilies/icon_idea.gif, won in the previous contest, do not count anymore. A new start for all!
12 After 5 pics, a list will be put up showing the overall winners. After 10 pics, you'll have a list of the 2nd period of 5 pics, plus one looking back on all pics. And so on.

To properly end the old contest, here are the results (awarded with lightbulbs)

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/pics/pic062.jpg
visit all the previous winners at this website:
Reasonably Witty dot TK (http://www.reasonablywitty.tk)

Cadpig: For once Harry is inside the Big Giant Head... and decides to re-decorate. 3 bulbs

Leatherpatches: The dental world was rocked by the discovery of Colgate's Asian sweatshops 2 bulbs

Shaken not Disturbed: The headhunter race hasn't extincted, they just shrunk. 1 bulb

The score, looking back on the last period in the old forums, is thus:

Lemur: 6
Leatherpatches: 5
Scrambled: 5
Prodigy69: 4
Cadpig: 3
Evilm00se: 2
Katox: 2
Arsenic: 1
Bob's Evil Minion: 1
Shaken not Disturbed: 1

Lemur is a known Caption Veteran. And we all hope he will join us here too. Yay to all other winners too!

Now then.

Here it is: Picture Number 1 (thanks to Shpooz

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/captions/picture0001.jpg

get captioning!

[bufo]

First attempt:
Ice fishing in the summer just isn't the same

[scram]

Give an Irishman a fish and he'll eat for a day, give him a fishing rod and he'll fish in the middle of a bloody road.

Bomb crater gives hope to one lonely Iraqi

[croz]

Nobody had the heart to tell Frank that it was just a large pothole.

[Micky]

First post of a new competition, you'd think I'd have a good one lined up, but who wants to break with tradition? :p

Peter had fallen for his kids' joke hook, line and sinker


[/will probably be edited when I think of something better, shouldn't be too hard]

[Norbington]

Frank would defend his pot hole by any means possible

yes I know

it's awful

[Destrukto]

Originally posted by PoofBird
3. Only I post new pics. If you have ideas for new pics, give me a PM


Read the rules before you mess up a thread...

[freddiestarfish]

Global warming was beginning to affect even the most unlikely sports

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

The way to catch Oriental Chinese food.


btw - Could i request a change of my name on the scoreboard, I'm Bob's 3v1l |\/|1|\|10|\| - the new forums dont like the length of my name

[Nanaki]

'fishing for the rare carp-ark fish'

[dugan]

that dog-gone giant done gone left a foots-print on my dead squirrel.

[lemur]

1: despite the fisherman's best efforts, barrelhead (far left) had eluded him once again

2: fishing? no, i was just walking my pet puddle and fancied a sit-down..

[Dwarfer_stu]

Harry was beginning to get very upset by the vibrations of the cars scaring the fish off.

Gary began to wonder whether his short-sighted vision was beginning to affect his ability to tell how far away these 'lakes' really are...

[gopherboy]

Billy's gnome costume was gonna need some work is he was ever gonna turn professional...

[Trof]

:weebl: The British remake of Jaws was a big disappointment for every one

[Shpox]

yay for piccy and poofbird.

a) Im never trusting fred to book me a fishing trip again.

b) Jim whispered among his friends: "other people have to goto lakes for fishin, i jus go down the street" he said proudly.


c) Hah ! and they said i wouldn't find a good fishing spot !.


a) and c) are my entries ;)


:p

[Mr.3374]

The wife just said "go to the high street and get me some fish....."

[static07]

-1- I'll never buy this Quick Dry Cement brand again!

-2- Noodles? anyone?


Oh I was Shaken Not Disturbed (nick was to long) :ninja:

[Arsenic]

Terry tried to hide his projectile vomit by aiming it at the ground, it didn't work.

*there'll be another one here soon*

[gopherboy]

James Bond was beginning to wonder whether this really was a good disguise, and whether M was just trying to get him killed.

[Eddz W]

"John had been told several times by the police not to show his rod in public, but he never obeyed."

;)

[Micky]

k. Numero dos:

Drug laws are much more relaxed in the Netherlands - pot holes in the middle of the street!

[bufo]

Second entry:
Stupid Billy finally got a job working for the government: Hitting blind and retarded people with a stick when they tend to walk into the giant pothole

[Empty Pie Dish]

Mr.Jones couldnt beat the will of the happy America fisherman .


This is the CNN news and we have been here for hours trying to convice the man that he cant fish the Lock Ness monster with a pie in a pot hole in the middle of the street.

[Space Monkey]

The search for the white whale had driven Captain Ahab quite mad



o.O

[PoofBird]

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/pics/pic0001.jpg
visit Reasonably Witty Dot TK (http://www.reasonablywitty.com) for previous winners

lemur: fishing? no, i was just walking my pet puddle and fancied a sit-down.. :weebl: :weebl: :weebl: laughing out loud

mr 3374: The wife just said "go to the high street and get me some fish....." :weebl: :weebl: *snort*

Eddz W: "John had been told several times by the police not to show his rod in public, but he never obeyed." :weebl: nice

on to the next

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/captions/picture0002.jpg

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

Kissing babies was one thing, but kissing dogs didn't get president bush anywhere



Bush to dog: Ahah, Scooby Doo, you may have foiled my plains this time, but you will not stop me! muahahaha!

[Mr.3374]

Tony?
My how you've changed.......

[freddiestarfish]

Mr Bush meets Cherie blair for the first time...




*guy on left
"what did you have for breakfast?!"

[bufo]

1st attempt:

Guy on the left: "Stop scaring those kids George, that's not what a bomb looks like"
George:"Really?......oops"

[The_Cyclops]

When Bush finaly coughed up his phlegm everyone realised why he had such bad dog breath.

[Nanaki]

'No Mr Bush, when he called yiou a SOB he wasnt being literal'

'Stand back people that dog is realy a warhead!'

[Dwarfer_stu]

1- Osama was begining to suspect his costume may not be as good as the shop attendant said after all...

may think of a second one later...

[Pie Diddy]

George: Now look what you've made me do, you made me poke that guy. Are you happy now you sick puppy?

And

Kid standing by Bush: ARGGHHH!!

[Liria]

"See, she knows 'Safe!', now I just have to teach her to run around the bases in the right order."

And:

"A Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush, a Bush,

Softball, softball,

(etc. etc.)

Argh, dog, argh, dog, it's a dog...

(repeat)"

[donkey_pie]

"After the pretzel failed to stop Mr Bush he decided to try to swallow a dog whole, alas the dog would have none of it"

[Shpox]

"Now lissen you. On the before of the united states law i declare that for fuck sake dont piss on me. dont make it political"
'n'
" did you just poop on one of my players ? better sends for safety expecters then.

[Space Monkey]

Much to the Children's horror Bush let one go, of course he tried to blame the dog

[static07]

-1- where's your greencard dogface!

-2- Kids watched George puking his guts out, don't play just after dinner.

[O_oo_O]

confused real hot girl

*edit by Destrukto*
Stop fucking around in threads
second warning...

[Norbington]

"And then bush killed the dog with his evil ray vision much to the delight of the girl at the back"

or

"The presence of Bush makes all our canine friends squirm in pain"

[Micky]

One of the older members of the canine training school still hadn't got the hang of 'roll over'

[Dwarfer_stu]

my 2nd one -

After the kids spotted the dog's erection, George decided he had to go in and investigate.

[lemur]

and here we were thinking it was only Clinton that could reach third base with a dog....

[Destrukto]

Dog: I only wanted to SMELL you bum, idiot!

[The_Cyclops]

OK, cough up the little girls socks!

[thedevilmademe]

George Bush: I faked the WMD to get oil! I woulda made it too if it weren't for you meddling kids!

[GandalfThePies]

What, whats that you say, Theres someone trapped in the old Mine?

Quickly Tell Colin powell Ive found the B*****d!

[Dødens Knekt]

Look like a monkey! Look like a monkey! Good president, oh that's a good president.

[scram]

The sniper missed.

:twisted:

Bush's hairpiece was made of real dog hair. If only it didn't keep falling off!

[cadpig]

Sombody is about to have his temperature taken and if you cant tell who by looking at this picture then we are not going to tell you.

[gopherboy]

1.President Bush checks for a loaded bum...

2. Saddams dog had been brought in for questioning but simply refused to roll over.

[Ferret Pie]

George searched the dog for Nukes then called for an airstrike.

George utilised the attack poodle on a group of anti war teens.

[WigZ]

First attempt ever: News flash: Earlier today, Presidant Bush threw out his back trying to stroke Inky, Michigan's only Childrens disabled home's Mascot, Inky, like the children, experianced fits after hearing Bush speak for more then 5 seconds.

[PoofBird]

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/pics/pic0002.jpg
visit previous winners at Reasonably Witty dot TK (http://www.reasonablywitty.tk)

Scrambled: The sniper missed. :weebl: :weebl: :weebl:

Lemur: and here we were thinking it was only Clinton that could reach third base with a dog.... :weebl: :weebl:

GandalfthePies: What, whats that you say, Theres someone trapped in the old Mine :weebl:

ah, yes, scrambled does it again.... with Lemur close behind him

Pic #3

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/captions/picture0003.jpg

[WigZ]

1:Little did Jim know where Phil's walking stick would be going soon. Chris was but a spectatgor to the diabolical event
2: Last one to die wins everything on the tabel

[Dwarfer_stu]

1) The boys didnt realise the lapdancer would have to count all of the change before she could start

[cadpig]

Wallace and Gromit proves to not so popular with the over 80's

[dugan]

1.) the three homeless men finally got enough money for their friend (far right) to have a liver transplant, just as the liver slides onto his lap

2.)pete was sick of rookie hoboes trying to impress strangers with ties and fake eyebrows

[freddiestarfish]

with all the betts in, pete suddenley realised Phill had forgotten the cards.

[Mr.3374]

1: Whadya mean,they don't take drachmas....


2:As the train approached the station,it became clear they misunderstood the phrase "all change at Crewe".....

[FLYBUYF1]

dont knock my tea cosie you wipper snapper :p

A fun time was being had by all. except ofcourse the cranky old codger that was stuck between two other old buggers that had gas. :eek:


:nana:



it was a good scam telling the reporter that they were world war 1 soldiers. just look at all the money they got. Now Bill can get a jacket that has longer arms and fits better, Bob can buy a real hat and replace his tea cosie and fred can get a prosthetic hip and throw out his walking stick.


:nana: :nana:

[Shpox]

(middle guy)

see that guy ?. he trying to steal my cookie. :D

give me back my testical and false teeth while you are at it.:)

[Trof]

:cool: Sadham on the left and Binladen in the centre were more than happy with their new disguise

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

The annual wear a retarded hat to the caf' day received many supporters



NUMBERR 2


'So, I wonder if we can get a FEMALE stripper this time'

[Ferret Pie]

Compo threw the issue of 'womens weekly' and took his chance.

Bankrobbers: if you wait 50 years to spend you'll be buying incontinnence pants.

[Weeman]

Robbing a bank, £1000
Visiting a cafe, £10
Realising the man on your right is wearing lipstick, priceless.

[Micky]

Is this enough Euros for one of those cheese and liver sausages?

[Evilone]

and the annual villiage "leering old man" competition had begun!

[2PieR]

David Blaine ruins yet another perfectly good meal by turning it into coins.

[scram]

You're never gonna guess what guys, I lost count AGAIN!

Yorkshire Pirates have lost their edge.

[static07]

-2- I'll quickly move my pion when no one is looking, they'll never know!

[TheJamfan]

lol

[gopherboy]

1.Compo misunderstood when the stripper said that the first stroke was free.

Or the same joke reworded. I wasnt sure...

2. the old man duely obliged when the stripper asked if he wanted a stroke.

[Empty Pie Dish]

Hey Bob where are we and whats all this junk?
Don't know.Lets throw it away.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
They only too late realised that what they ate wasnt hard candy.

[Beef Magic]

With money the three grandad's saved up for Little Timmy's birthday, they decided they could blow it all on a Weekend bender at Margate.

[GandalfThePies]

The car-boot sale went well but compo was obviously annoyed at selling his only trousers!


Get yer own stinking change, Get your fingers off, Friends thats what ur called, DO I LOOK LIKE A BANK!

[The_Cyclops]

After raiding the wishing well it was time for a slap up tea at Mrs Miggins Pie Shop.

[static07]

-2- now he looks like a tasty snack ... mmm

[Dibbie]

"Yeah so apparently if we give Poofbird all this cash we will make it into a caption contest and finally people will find us funny \o/"

[cow_cop]

kid: nice lugy mister bush

[cow_cop]

oopz, thought it was still on old caption contest :)

guy on left- lets hold hands
center guy- i wanna hold something else of yours...

[cadpig]

Since I have already entered for this caption and I will probably be away for the next one I have decided to try and enter it now, sorry if this is confusing :confused:

So this is my entry for the next pic :D

1. Food is not supposed to go in that hole...

2. Roses are red, violets are blue, Sugar is sweet I'M GONNA BREAK YOUR FACE!!!!

I'm off on holidays now, see you all when I get back :)

[bufo]

Being the lavatory attendants for the incontinent-old-people bar is a busy job

[EasyTiger]

Ey up Cleggy, I don' think Compo knows these are chocolate coins like.

[mysilencedglory]

1. This should pay off the bill to the Alzheimer's...um...what was it again, boys?

2. Middle guy: Okay...I get this half, and you guys get to share the rest with my seventeen sisters.

[scram]

Originally posted by EasyTiger
Ey up Cleggy, I don' think Compo knows these are chocolate coins like.

No fair!

We can't speak proper northern like what you can! I declare shenanigans!

[Microman]

i told you before johny, dont tuch my money

[EasyTiger]

Originally posted by Scrambled
No fair!

We can't speak proper northern like what you can! I declare shenanigans!

*beams* ;)

[cow_cop]

so is anyone else posting in the caption contest? this topic hasnt gotten a single post for a few days.

[Microman]

i think we need a new pic to make captions of

[Shpox]

be patient, Poofbird will post results soon.. :p

[PoofBird]

I got a new pic ready.... not decided on the winners yet...

plus i had to spend some quality time with the GF, who left to germany today

patience! update soon

[link hero of pi]

hmmm

edit: soz didnt notice that do'h

[scram]

*hands link a copy of the plot*

I suggest you get with it.

[cow_cop]

the new pic should have something to do with....:nana:!!!!

[prodigy69]

lol I've been away to long :rolleyes:

I'll join in on the next pic :)

[PoofBird]

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/pics/pic0003.jpg
Visit Reasonably Witty dot TK (www.reasonablywitty.tk) for previous winners

Scrambled: You're never gonna guess what guys, I lost count AGAIN! :weebl: :weebl: :weebl:

Gopherboy: Compo misunderstood when the stripper said that the first stroke was free. :weebl: :weebl:

freddiestarfish: with all the betts in, pete suddenley realised Phill had forgotten the cards. :weebl:


yay

next (thanks for patience!)

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/captions/picture0004.jpg

[EasyTiger]

it's the afro bus!

[PoofBird]

for the record:

Cadpig's entries for this pic:

1. Food is not supposed to go in that hole...

2. Roses are red, violets are blue, Sugar is sweet I'M GONNA BREAK YOUR FACE!!!!

[Mr.3374]

Although it had a nice traditional look to it,Scammel abondoned the idea of Thatched rooves for their new wagon fleet.....

[prodigy69]

Phone Beaver Brothers for all your dam building needs

[Microman]

after seeing this site too many times in the 60's , the US senate decided to make marijuana illegal

[Ferret Pie]

New craze sweeping the nation: afro cars!!

When the rasta work force had loaded up the truck it looked rather different...

[Norbington]

1) Attack of the Giant Tribbles!

that's actually all I have

[*coo*]

1.) lucy knew that her horse was big but she didnt know it would need THAT much food

2.) 'with these quick repairs, mom and dad will never know we crashed the van!'

[freddiestarfish]

eric had finally had it, he was taking jon for a haircut.



i wonder if this voids my insurance...

[The_Cyclops]

Farmer Giles finaly decided it was time to stop his genetic experiments on hedgehogs.


Jack regretted planting the bean in the compost on the back of his truck.

[Trof]

:weebl:
1)After over feeding the hedgehog they had terrible trouble getting it to the vets

2)The government failed to hide the genetically modified porcupine as they tried to suggle it out of the research lab

[gopherboy]

1. Having been constipated for the last 3 years daisy the cow desided not to thank the truck driver for scaring the shit out of her...

2. Asylem Seekers go to new lengths to enter Britain... Theres two in the cow!

p.s laughing my arse of at fishsticks number 1. lol

[Microman]

jessica, have beeing born in the late 60's never learnd from here mother how to manage her self :p

[Arsenic]

1) - Think your van is so cool? Our van's got big hairy balls, literally.

TO BE CONTINUED - - Subject to review.

[link hero of pi]

1.It's Bush's country...


2.The cow was walking across the road and then suddenly it saw a big f***er of an afro on a stupid truck infront of it..

[Weeman]

1) Doctor Who realises that the budget for the enemies has gone up.

2) Look when I said to feed the cow all that laxative, I meant after I'd moved my van away.

[GandalfThePies]

1. I got me some Smoke mate, NO stupid its not completly legal yet!

2. Garden force Cut Charlie's Bush for some scrubbery for there next project!

[PoofBird]

to Manwee and Fishstick (again, check your pm's)

only two entries are allowed for each pic.

please select your 2 favourites and delete the third. (or else I will, and i'm a bad picker)

[bufo]

When the Jackson 5 broke up Tito ended up keeping the Jacksonmobile

[PoofBird]

Originally posted by bufo
When the Jackson 5 broke up Tito ended up keeping the Jacksonmobile

that actually made me laugh out loud...

carry on

[freddiestarfish]

heh

me too

get rid of my 2nd one

and add this

"hairy lee forgot to take his hair growth tonic with him as he left for spain..."

[link hero of pi]

Originally posted by bufo
When the Jackson 5 broke up Tito ended up keeping the Jacksonmobile
lmao..and change my 2nd one plz to this..

after they relised they hit a cow they tried to desguise their van as a jamaican

[static07]

-1- To the hairlotion van!

[FLYBUYF1]

1) Betsie the cow knew nobody would suspect her of smuggling reefer.


2) Look Betsies trying to tell us something! whats that betsie? thats not really reefer?! Theyre smuggling midget mexican pole dancers under their??? SWEET MOTHER OF JESUS!!!!..... BRING ON THE MIDGET MEXICAN POLE DANCERS!!!!!!!

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

The US went slightly over the top on camoflage this war round

[fishstick]

Originally posted by fishstick

1.
"I'm just gonna run that Big Bad Wolf's ass over if he tries that shit again."


2.
Due to Bessie's unchecked greed in their hay heist, Millie is forced to hoof it back to the ranch.

[mysilencedglory]

I said, "I can't understand you, Butch." He heard, "Run the van into a bush." Damn cellular static.

NEW! o.o

This is why cows don't drive vans. Cars, however, are another story. Moo.

[Drukqs]

Fish sure live in crummy ponds these days...

[Microman]

:confused: you should read the whole thread before replying

[static07]

-2- New middle-east cloaking technology surprises world.

[Mr.3374]

"I said fill the tyres with AIR,not HAIR.........."

[Liria]

1) ch... ch... ch... CHIA! The new chia truck! It keeps growing and growing and growing...

(was that just an American craze?)

2) The camel wept, for he knew that no matter how he tried, he would never hold that much straw on his back...

[scram]

Poofbirds build nest on van. Motorist angry.

Bond worried about Q's sanity when he saw his new camoflaged spycar.

[bufo]

2- After a brief discussions the Beverly Hillbillies decided there was no place left for grandma on the moving van

[Twatybollocks]

1 - Mrs Yeti tries out new monster sex toy.

2 - New suppository specifically designed for hairy woman tested on the road...yesterday

[PoofBird]

Shox...

don't double post like that,

and read the rules, 2 captions each!

remove 2, or you are disqualified

[ShoX-17]

oops sorry, i am knew at this, how do i remove them???:confused:

[PoofBird]

there is an edit button underneath each post

press it. You can now change your post, or even delete it.

[ShoX-17]

THANKS

1) ARRGH, YARDIE FARMERS

2) Always tell You Girlfriend To shave her muff

[Microman]

poof can you decid a winner already, its been a while and i want to know who won

[PoofBird]

well well

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/pics/pic0004.jpg
please visit Reasonably Witty dot TK (www.reasonablywitty.tk)

Bufo: When the Jackson 5 broke up Tito ended up keeping the Jacksonmobile:weebl: :weebl: :weebl:

Scrambled: Bond worried about Q's sanity when he saw his new camoflaged spycar.:weebl: :weebl:

Twatybollocks: Mrs Yeti tries out new monster sex toy.:weebl:

Also visit the new Paint Contest website! vote for your own pics (and others) and see who's most popular!
Agonizing Paint dot TK (www.agonizingpaint.tk)

well done

next pic:

http://www.xs4all.nl/~a1rta1ud/poofbird/captions/picture0005.jpg

[skoo]

The plastic surgeon was fired shortly after his patient woke up.

[djnrrd]

No.11 didn't realise that while it may be called that, you don't actually blow...

[scram]

1) Japanese in Blow Job Confusion Shocker

2) When they ran out of balloons for Timmy's party, Mother improvised.

[freddiestarfish]

although it took alot of effort preparing her boyfriend, the end result was worth it for emily.

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

and everyone thought that blowing bubbles with gum was boring?

[Weeman]

...and that, my friends, is why you should never read sex books translated from english to japanese by a dutchman.

[gopherboy]

1.WARNING : Never sneeze after super glueing your nostrils shut!

2. Number 11 stopped suddenly when she realised her condom had been used.


On another note, i don't think i've ever seen a brown condom before. fasinating!

[prodigy69]

it was number 11's job to blow up The Prisoners attack spheres


if you don't get it looky here (http://www.retroweb.com/prisoner/prisx60r.jpg)

[S-t-a-r]

and tonight on major plastic surgery cock ups, number 11 who's nose was literally cocked up!

[EasyTiger]

Melissa demonstrates the size of the new XXXXXXXXL durex condoms.

[bufo]

1- As Sandra had more drinks, her balloon animal act got better and better

2-"Wait! I already used that one!"

[Mr.3374]

Of course,the fun started when they had to release them then try to catch them....

[mysilencedglory]

Tonight on "More Uses For Condoms", we have a nice little clip we like to call 'A Bit Of Japanese Ingenuity'.

[PoofBird]

Originally posted by gopherboy

On another note, i don't think i've ever seen a brown condom before. fasinating!

ah, I take it you've never been there?

[Trof]

:weebl:
1) The Chinese government try out new SARS protection device

[Arsenic]

Miss Li was so keen to start her blowjob lessons, she skipped ahead to the practical without even knowing where to start.

Might be another one later, probably no wittier.

[static07]

-1- Just when she was about to eat the blowfish ...

-2- I can't hear the sea, I'll put it in myself!

[Twatybollocks]

Originally posted by PoofBird
ah, I take it you've never been there?


EEEUUWWWW! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Make the bad Poofbird stop!

[cadpig]

1. Sakuras voice changer forever after that faitful day and she could not help but wonder if she had swollowed something she shouldn't have.

2. Amy wondered if she was doing something wrong as all the other girls seemed to be ballencing them.....

[Ferret Pie]

After the party it became clear that the sex ED teacher had not covered some sections...

The world record attempt at blowing bubblegum ended in tragedy as the bubble took over lucie's mind.

[cow_cop]

boy, its gonna hurt reel bad when i use this.....

[*coo*]

1. brett didn't think Kara understood when he told her to 'blow me with the comdom

2. Lia knew that she had a cold, but she was horrified to see that snot had taken over.

both poo. very poo.

[Pie Priestess]

Introducing: Japan's new mail-order novelty "Blow Job To Go."
A perfect holiday gift for that cranky uncle or far-away friend you want to send slobering salutions; each individually created Blow-Job-In-a-Bag is lovely crafted by specially selected oral specialists.

[Empty Pie Dish]

she liked to suck that stuff but she tastes the last one before marriage(i meant milk in elastic rubber)

Jenny went crazy when she ran out of baloons.. then she remembered last night...

[Trof]

:weebl:
2) The other competittors supetcted number 11 of illegal collagen injected lips

[Angry_Pierre]

It was only upon closer inspection that they discovered No.11 had eaten Jordan.

Edit:To the non-british among us, Jordan is a model with big fake boobs.

[gopherboy]

Originally posted by Angry_Pierre
It was only upon closer inspection that they discovered No.11 had eaten Jordan.

The Country? Lovely mountain ranges so i hear...

[Edit] I know, I was being funny, hense the "lovely mountain ranges so I hear" bit

http://www.nacional.hr/pictures/dnevne/1504_.jpg

[bufo]

change my second one to:

Childrens' bithday parties are always something special at R Kelly's place

[PoofBird]

good news everyone!

i will update sometime tomorrow...
as currently i am low on time, connection and photoshop (to create the winner pic)

[ZekeyLizard]

1. Kira Onichiwaha was found dead....the only traces the killer left behind were a few torn shards of rubber.

2. Boy Jane, usually your parties suck....but this one blows!

[PoofBird]

Bufo: As Sandra had more drinks, her balloon animal act got better and better :weebl: :weebl: :weebl:

Skoo: The plastic surgeon was fired shortly after his patient woke up :weebl: :weebl:

Goperboy: WARNING : Never sneeze after super glueing your nostrils shut! :weebl:

I will update this pic later, with proper celebratory pic.
Also, I will update www.reasonablywitty.tk later, but you're still welcome to have a look at all the previous winners.

next:

[PeePers]

they're the new Fad:
Jojo-japanese

[freddiestarfish]

the new office secrity system prevents you from trying to escape work early.

[cow_cop]

i took WAYYY too much helium.

[basstard]

1. The auditions for Letterland - the Movie were a success, until people started to audition for Jumping Jack's part.

2. The modern interpretation of the Indian Rope Trick involves a phone cord, and an office.

[mysilencedglory]

ah, lets go with the classic:

1. Look Ma, No Hands!!

and one from my head!:

2. Just practicing for my "Float-aerobics" session later...

[ZekeyLizard]

1. Crouching Tiger Hidden Secretary

2. Telephone Bill soars like eagle....

[bufo]

1- You plugged her in? Then maybe we should just stuff batteries in her next time

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

NEW NINJA SECRETARY - Twice as efficiant as a standard secretary
batteries sold seperately

[cadpig]

I have just watched Airoplain :)

1. It seemed like a good idea at the time but after much thought Frank realised that rubing his auto-secretary on his head was not such a good idea after all.

2. WARNING: Gluing everything to the wall can cause confusion

[scram]

1) Proof that smoking office pot plants make you high.

2) Patricia now regretted insisting on the Sunny-Dee

[gopherboy]

1. Susans possessed winged pantie liner was playing up again.

2. Susans idea to squeeze out a quiet fart didnt quite go to plan.

3. Maybe those 5 cans of Red Bull were a mistake thought Susan.

4. A demonstration of the lockheed designed office ejector seat.

Erm.... I think i'll stick with 1 and 2. Poofbird tell me after you've judged the winner if you think either of the other two were better - just so i know :D

[static07]

mmmmmm, tentacle

[Angry_Pierre]

1.Sandra was ecstatic when she realised it was time for Newsround.

2.The office joker plays his "no gravity" prank again to brilliant effect.

[Trof]

:weebl:
1) AOL workers celebrate there first satisfied customer

[Shiny_macShine]

1. geraldine always starts her day at the office with the haka

2. geraldine proves the theory that, match + fart = take off

[Cookies]

Mauves halloween costume went down a treat

[Arsenic]

Our organisation turns Cambodian landmine victims into useful secretaries. This one was in mid-air when the wind changed and she is now stuck that way.

[Mr.3374]

During trials of the "zero-gravity" call centre,it became obvious that no-one could access their pc's.......

[static07]

I tought these telephonewires supposed to be flexible?!

[psychohamster]

1. Another day tied down at the office.....

2. Secretary amazingly gives birth to telephone in aerobic display of motherly love.

3. Ill get those TPS reports A-SAP!!

4. Obviously Anime has now made its way into the workplace.

Ill go with, um, 1 and 3.

[Empty Pie Dish]

ok..forget my last 2..they sucked..

these ones are better

Jenna listened when they said "jump and smile" on the phone
, it resulted as a prank call. (mwahaha)


Holly didnt listen to the dont roll up wire or eletrical anti-gravity charge will hit you rule, she insisted in having fun with her chair


(that explains the big smile)

[CloudNeroZ]

This new hands-free head set allows you to go here, there, and everywhere!

[Twatybollocks]

1 - Trinity can't help but show off at her day job.

2 - New Secretary kite proves very popular in the office.

[Weeman]

It's fun to stay at the Y...M...C...A!

[Micky]

Practical Jokes Rule One: Even if you can jump 6 feet into the air from behind a desk, don't bother doing it when there's no-one around to scare

:| hmmm, maybe not, how about...

No-one told Kym that the boss's surprise party was actually in the canteen...

[gopherboy]

LOL definately the second one - made me smile real big and I was in a mood.... uh... bugger - just remembered why im in a mood so im in a mood again. Damn.

Sorry Poofbird for interrupting your thred.. ahem.

[lemur]

i cant for the life of me think of a caption for this picture :(

[Ferret Pie]

Candid camera took the "upside down room" gag a little too far...
or
Electrochair : the only electric chair which knows when you're slacking.

[fishstick]

Giant weed attacked in office, film at 11.

[lastminute.tom]

1. carol couldn't wait for her bungee jumping holiday

2. Jenny attains enlightenment

must post earlier

[electric gremmy]

filling her incontinence knickers with helium was obviously a bad idea

[Mr.3374]

Mr 3374 has just resigned!!!!!

[mysilencedglory]

Kee, I was inspired for another caption or two. The second one on my last post is being tossed out of the contest(see page...thirteen i think).

"It's 5:25. Do you know where YOUR chair is?"

"The company is relocating to the Moon, so they turned the gravity off for us to get used to it."

FIVE-SECOND-LATER EDIT: The first one on this post is being tossed out too. I just had to post it. =\.

[smiley clown]

The real reason for moving call centres to India was the enthusiasm of the workforce.

[bufo]

2nd attempt:

"Sissy bought a new jumpsuit"

[Seraph]

OK, ive never done one of these caption contests before, but im gonna try.

'George... I think Melanie got a megaphone telemarketer again..'

:)

[Spider]

This is my first go at the also....

Most of the employees agreed they should keep the old clock.

[Wally]

So the boss hammered his secetary to the wall..

[smiley clown]

mkay second try:

Carol was subject to a new technology in prank calls.

[gopherboy]

Cod, is Puffbird still on holiday? This picture is so like.. last month.. cod!!! :D

[PoofBird]

Holydays and all that... also busy finishing my bloody studies

and: I've run this thread for ages and ages and ages... it's great fun... but I think it's time it needs a new leader.
I have other contests to run, and they are all lacking as I don't know where to start anymore. We need a worthy caption king!

a clear mind who will take this thread to greater heights.

If you are up for the job, please PM me with your application.

I will need your age, sex and credit card number...

and a 20 word essay on why you are suitable for the job

[gopherboy]

Nooooooo!!! You can't do it!!! This is my favourite thread in the whole world!!! Bah, why does the world always want to ruin whats beautiful... sniff....

[PoofBird]

this thread will continue... by all means.

we will just have to find a suitable replacemens...

I have 1 application so far.

from now on, you can also pm me with nominations. Name the forumite you think will do a good job.

[Mr.3374]

So announce a winner,put up new pic,and sort nominees while we do a new comp.
I'd offer,but an upcoming change in jobs will mean too little time for the web.

[PoofBird]

a succesor has been selected... so there will be an update soon, but not by me


I am looking forward to entering this contest myself :)

[Micky]

Yes, I am now the official caption runner/judge (thanks Poofbird), which means you don't have to listen to any of my caption attempts anymore! (woos and yays and so on)

Special thanks to Poofbird for running the competition so well for so long *applauds*.

Also, please note Poofbird's rules from page 1 still apply, but this will be the first of a set of five pictures, unless anyone has any major objections.

I have looked at the entries for this competition, and the first winners are as follows (I'll edit to add the updated picture, my internet's being a bit on-and-off, can't get to certain pages):

http://www.digikitten.com/playhousev2/files/MickyW/caption1c.jpg

Trof: AOL workers celebrate there first satisfied customer :weebl: :weebl: :weebl:

smiley clown: The real reason for moving call centres to India was the enthusiasm of the workforce. :weebl: :weebl:

Twatybollocks: Trinity can't help but show off at her day job. :weebl:

Hope you'll agree with those, and if not, well, er, yeah...

The new pic!

[gopherboy]

Cheers Micky for taking the baton. I'm sure you'll do a great job. Obviously judging by your winners for the last competition Poofbird didnt tell you about our little arrangment ;)

1. Ah.. nuts!

2. The Rodent Olympic Diving competition gets under way.

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

1. EVERYONE, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, I'M A SQUIRREL ON THE EDGE



2. If this little critter was any more careless, he'd be able to store his nuts in a tree for the winter

[ZekeyLizard]

Damn you farmer brown

i hope no one sees me like this

[Angry_Pierre]

The Squirrel Scrotum Staple bandit strikes again

[BlueHippo]

Squirrel bungee atempts gone wrong volume IV

[William Wallace]

Lord god, please spare me.

*jumps*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!

[freddiestarfish]

With the rising house prices, Jim was dissapointed with what he could afford

[malcolio]

Not having a mate, Jim resorts to inanimate objects to meet his lust.

[Mr.3374]

The water!!!!
Who's moved the bucket of water.......

[Micky]

Just got to say - some fantastic entries already! I'm going to have trouble choosing this one :)

Keep 'em coming!

edit: winning caption pic updated!

[Trof]

:weebl:

1) Secrete Squirrel fell on hard time after they canceled his cartoon show

[cadpig]

1. "but the script said to take off and go nuts!!"

3. Budget cuts call for rethink of mission impossible opening sequence

[Empty Pie Dish]

1. Tim the squirrel was utterly shocked by the new jumping board to the pool system.

2.His last words:Goodbye cruel world may god take me to a better nut house.

[static07]

Timitothy A. Squirrel rocks Jane Birds world!

[lemur]

1: Steven Squirrelberg's rodentesque remaking of 'the birdhouse' was from a slightly different angle.

2: Despite being burned up on re-entry, the wooden spaceman's wig was still in-tact.

[Nocashvalue]

Sammy Squirrell finds a comfortable sleeping position
:o

[PlasticVicar]

The all new American B2178 Bomber in action over Iraq

[Jamers]

And here is John Walker, representing England in this years Squirrel Olympics. The question is, will he get the gold for the third year in a row?

Anything to escape with the birds crumbs.

WELL THAT WAS A HEAP OF RUBBISH, AND THERE'S MORE TO COME IN THE FUTURE!

[Jamers Random]

He he, used stupid account....pressed enter at wrong time, so anyway, those JAMERS ones were meant to be on this account...if it makes any difference :D

[Ferret Pie]

Stuffed squirrels don't eat yer' nuts!

Taxidermists use cunning plans...

[Twatybollocks]

In the animal version of Big Brother, the first eviction doesn't go down too well.

Invisible frog sitting on a squirrel shocker - Has DNA manipulation gone too far?

[basstard]

New super product from japanco! Elastic Squirrel, now bends through 90 degrees of fun!



Microsoft's bug spotter's just been hanging around the last couple weeks.

[Micky]

Well, some great responses to the squirrel picture - the next competition pic should be in the following post (trying to save on webhosting space by attaching everything) - but I had to choose three, and here they are:

gopher boy: Ah.. nuts! :weebl: :weebl: :weebl: Simple, but genius

freddiestarfish: With the rising house prices, Jim was dissapointed with what he could afford :weebl: :weebl: Topical humour = good ;)

Mr.3374: The water!!!! Who's moved the bucket of water....... :weebl: Made me smile :)

I have to mention lemur and evil minion, though, both of whose first entries came close to some :weebl: action, but for now I'm only giving out whole :weebl:s!

[Micky]

Get captioning and good luck!

[Rogue]

1. Roger was on a quest to bring the word "weird" to new heights

[Tommuz]

"What do you think of my new hat? The tusks were extra"

[PoofBird]

Billy the Beaver had to bring his own logs to the lumber-party, as his tusks grew from his nose, rather than his mouth.

[katox]

(Sung in a Simpsons 'See My Vest' kinda way, sort of:/)

"See my hat! See my hat! Made from the rigid tails of some cats!"

...

[Munkee]

"Waldo took his status of "silly sausage" to new extremes".


"New from Walls... HATS... (now available in pork and beefs).

[static07]

you know what they say; You are what you eat.

[BlueHippo]

are you SURE this will help cure my cold?

[freddiestarfish]

dave had an suspicion that the other walruss' had seen through his disguise

[Hiddenpower]

1. the last desperate cry for help from fame academy contestant pete.

[3v1l |\/|1NiOn]

1. a new radical treatment for cancer emerged, foodotherapy

2. George, a patient at the north london mental institute, prefered for people to call him Frederick Gooblemunch the third.