piemanmoo
16-06-2004, 06:32 AM
Here's my rendition of "The Raven (http://www.comnet.ca/~forrest/raven.html)" by Edgar Allen Poe,
Once upon a midnight creepy, while I ate food, very sleepy
Eating a Battenberg that had been delivered to my front door.
Soon after I started eating, suddenly I heard a beating
As of some sort of furious greeting, greeting me at my front door.
“ ‘Tis my Landlord” I muttered, “trying to get my rent once more”
“Only this, and nothing more”
Of course now, I remember. It was the thirteenth of September.
Feasting upon my dessert that I had paid so much for.
I ate my little Battenberg, which was imported straight from Luxembourg.
Trying to forget my loss of the other pastry, which forced tears from my eye.
For with the absence of the very succulent sweetness, I wouldn’t hesitate to cry
for my delicious, canned beef pie
This Battenberg would be filling, but my pallet was still willing
Willing to taste that golden, flakey crust off that perfect pie
But still I heard the heavy beating. Full of fear, my comfort was fleeting
“Perhaps a Jehovah with a pamphlet. Yes, I’m sure that must be it.
It’s a Jehovah who’s alerting me to try and be converting
That it is, and nothing more”
Although I wasn’t quite sure why, I decided to reply.
“Excuse me Sir,” said I. “Or madam. If you’d look up at the sky
you’d see that it’s very dark out, in fact it’s almost Midnight nigh.
A little late, wouldn’t you say? Perhaps you’d do better during the day.”
So why don’t you come back later.” Here I looked through the viewfinder on the door.
Emptiness there, and nothing more.
Deep into the void I stared. I guessed my vision was impaired
I thought it would help if I then took off my glasses and rubbed my eyes.
In front of me, still there was nothing. (How’s that for a surprise?)
But right then and there, my ears had spied, the being hidden from my eyes.
I heard the creepy, distorted voice from everywhere at once, it seemed.
“Mmmm….pie”. Once hearing this, my heart had screamed.
Slowly into the kitchen, backing, I decided to continue snacking.
Soon again I heard the pounding, this time louder than before
“Surely,” said I, “surely there’s no one at the door.
I would’ve seen them first, unless they’re a midget.” With the knob I began to fidget.
“Calm down, for soon it’ll be morning, and I can finally finish mourning
Mourning for my long lost pie.”
Here I threw open the barrier, and what I saw was much less scarier
In there wobbled a tiny Weeble who, at first, looked by no means evil
He bore hardly any civility, but with incredible agility;
He leapt onto my table which had once housed my darling pie
leapt onto the table, coming straight from my door
Sat and wobbled, and nothing more
To me this egg-like creature seemed almost like a teacher
Teaching me not to wallow in sadness, this was his courageous feature.
“Well, little Weeble” I humored “You had me startled that you were some other guy”
Though not expecting a response, I queried “What do you ask of I?”
Quoth the Weeble, “Mmmm….pie”
Much I marveled at this toy, that a language it would employ!
Though very garbled, it was, plus I did have trouble
deciphering its speech (thank goodness for the bubble)
Although one question was still unsolved, not how its speech had evolved
But whether the meaning in its chatter, was even relevant to the matter
Such a phrase as “mmm…pie”
But the Weeble, rocking slowly, said but just that one phrase only
Those two words that he uttered seemed to be everything he could mutter.
Nothing further than that he spoke, could this be some type of joke?
And then I realized! He was taunting! Taunting me and my long lost pie!
I can’t believe he was flaunting me, while in such horrible agony
Quoth the weeble “Mmm…pie”
Then I noticed the air smelled funny, like new roses and fresh honey
Pumped from a Glade plug-in that I never noticed before
“Whoa!” I cried, “look what God has sent me – by this freshener he has
sent me respite---respite and nepenthe from the memories of my lost pie!
Quaff, O quaff this kind nepenthe, and forget this lost pie!
Quoth the weeble, “Mmm…pie”
“That’s the word of your departing! Leave at once!” I shrieked upstarting--
Get out of my house right now and remove yourself from the sight of my eye!
Leaves no single mark as a token of the lie that you have spoken!
Take your false hope from my heart and go away right now! Good-bye!”
Quoth the weeble, “Mmm….pie.”
And the Weeble, ever squabbling, still is wobbling
Still is wobbling on top of my table where he ever reigns so high
And his eyes have all the blankness of a never-ending abyss.
And the kitchen light above him throws his shadow on the wall
And my spirit in the shadow shall forever be enthralled
with the memory….of the pie.
Once upon a midnight creepy, while I ate food, very sleepy
Eating a Battenberg that had been delivered to my front door.
Soon after I started eating, suddenly I heard a beating
As of some sort of furious greeting, greeting me at my front door.
“ ‘Tis my Landlord” I muttered, “trying to get my rent once more”
“Only this, and nothing more”
Of course now, I remember. It was the thirteenth of September.
Feasting upon my dessert that I had paid so much for.
I ate my little Battenberg, which was imported straight from Luxembourg.
Trying to forget my loss of the other pastry, which forced tears from my eye.
For with the absence of the very succulent sweetness, I wouldn’t hesitate to cry
for my delicious, canned beef pie
This Battenberg would be filling, but my pallet was still willing
Willing to taste that golden, flakey crust off that perfect pie
But still I heard the heavy beating. Full of fear, my comfort was fleeting
“Perhaps a Jehovah with a pamphlet. Yes, I’m sure that must be it.
It’s a Jehovah who’s alerting me to try and be converting
That it is, and nothing more”
Although I wasn’t quite sure why, I decided to reply.
“Excuse me Sir,” said I. “Or madam. If you’d look up at the sky
you’d see that it’s very dark out, in fact it’s almost Midnight nigh.
A little late, wouldn’t you say? Perhaps you’d do better during the day.”
So why don’t you come back later.” Here I looked through the viewfinder on the door.
Emptiness there, and nothing more.
Deep into the void I stared. I guessed my vision was impaired
I thought it would help if I then took off my glasses and rubbed my eyes.
In front of me, still there was nothing. (How’s that for a surprise?)
But right then and there, my ears had spied, the being hidden from my eyes.
I heard the creepy, distorted voice from everywhere at once, it seemed.
“Mmmm….pie”. Once hearing this, my heart had screamed.
Slowly into the kitchen, backing, I decided to continue snacking.
Soon again I heard the pounding, this time louder than before
“Surely,” said I, “surely there’s no one at the door.
I would’ve seen them first, unless they’re a midget.” With the knob I began to fidget.
“Calm down, for soon it’ll be morning, and I can finally finish mourning
Mourning for my long lost pie.”
Here I threw open the barrier, and what I saw was much less scarier
In there wobbled a tiny Weeble who, at first, looked by no means evil
He bore hardly any civility, but with incredible agility;
He leapt onto my table which had once housed my darling pie
leapt onto the table, coming straight from my door
Sat and wobbled, and nothing more
To me this egg-like creature seemed almost like a teacher
Teaching me not to wallow in sadness, this was his courageous feature.
“Well, little Weeble” I humored “You had me startled that you were some other guy”
Though not expecting a response, I queried “What do you ask of I?”
Quoth the Weeble, “Mmmm….pie”
Much I marveled at this toy, that a language it would employ!
Though very garbled, it was, plus I did have trouble
deciphering its speech (thank goodness for the bubble)
Although one question was still unsolved, not how its speech had evolved
But whether the meaning in its chatter, was even relevant to the matter
Such a phrase as “mmm…pie”
But the Weeble, rocking slowly, said but just that one phrase only
Those two words that he uttered seemed to be everything he could mutter.
Nothing further than that he spoke, could this be some type of joke?
And then I realized! He was taunting! Taunting me and my long lost pie!
I can’t believe he was flaunting me, while in such horrible agony
Quoth the weeble “Mmm…pie”
Then I noticed the air smelled funny, like new roses and fresh honey
Pumped from a Glade plug-in that I never noticed before
“Whoa!” I cried, “look what God has sent me – by this freshener he has
sent me respite---respite and nepenthe from the memories of my lost pie!
Quaff, O quaff this kind nepenthe, and forget this lost pie!
Quoth the weeble, “Mmm…pie”
“That’s the word of your departing! Leave at once!” I shrieked upstarting--
Get out of my house right now and remove yourself from the sight of my eye!
Leaves no single mark as a token of the lie that you have spoken!
Take your false hope from my heart and go away right now! Good-bye!”
Quoth the weeble, “Mmm….pie.”
And the Weeble, ever squabbling, still is wobbling
Still is wobbling on top of my table where he ever reigns so high
And his eyes have all the blankness of a never-ending abyss.
And the kitchen light above him throws his shadow on the wall
And my spirit in the shadow shall forever be enthralled
with the memory….of the pie.