bastard post office

[Digga]

Along with my normal post this morning when I leapt down the stairs briskly and athletically (or more accurately fell down), i noticed a card. This card first made me excited.

I thought someone had tried to deliver me a parcel, because normally cards indicate parcels, but no, this was not a joyous parcel card from the post office, this was a a card of HATE and ANGER. Here is the story of the card.

It is said that at the beginning, when the normal cards were forged, 9 for the humans and whatever the dwarves and elves got and stuff, postman pat secretly forged his own card in the lava of mount greendale. On this card was this inscription "one card to rule them all, one card to find them, one card to bring them all and in the darkness bind them".

Well not quite, what it actually said was my name and address, and that a letter had been failed to be delivered to me because the postage wasn't quite fully paid. Infact it was underpaid by 5p. FIVE SODDING PEE. And on top of not giving me my letter, they're slapping on a £1 handling fee, so i now have to pay the post office £1.05 for a letter that might be a load of crap.

How can you underpay for a letter anyway? it's a LETTER! Do you use lead paper to make it heavy? Do you fill it with 1p coins to make it heavy? do you put on 25 1p stamps and ask for it to be sent 1st class? Somebody please enlighten me, and offer revenge techniques to use if this letter is not of utmost importance. Also, give your entertaining post office stories if you desire or have any.

[Stringy Pete]

I had that once.

The letter was from the Dentist.


Let's just say they'll never be doing that again.
Or doing anything for that matter.

:twisted:
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Inverse]

DID YOU PAY?!

WHAT WAS THE LETTER ABOUT!?

You can't leave us without knowing, man!

[Horse]

I agree I think the post office charge is disproportionate. Is there a postal regulator?

[carpefula]

The Post Office wont let me have my Birthday Present!!

[bionic sheep]

Anthrax, perhaps?

[Fridge]

The post office is the only thing that I The Prince Of Forum Darkness is SCARED OF

[Naixin]

How about this then;

I got one of the very same cards. "Bastard", I thought, but went to the post office and paid £1.20ish.

The kick in the balls is, I never actually got the letter. Bloody inept Post Orifice.

[Purple Wabbit]

Ah, the Post Office. Mine of misinformation and lost souls. How many hapless beings have been brought down in their prime by this all-consuming monster? How many undeserved payments of petty cash have been wrenched from us poor mortals? How many missives gone astray due to mass ineptitude? Etc.

You, young child, have been sucked into this whirlpool of deceit and inability. Too late you have learned of the dangers of becoming immersed in that which you understand not, and putting your trust in those sure to disappoint. Evil is stalking you, child, stalking, closing in, gasping for your petty cash and feeding on the anger you feel at this unnecessary inconvenience. Yet have faith, young one, for there is a way out.

Pay these fiends, yet learn: those who play with fire will burn.

[Smartie]

I got one of these this week too.
My answer "fuck it, if it's important they'll write to me again".

[renatzu]

Ask them who it's from. If you know them, they'll reimburse you. If you don't know the name, then don't pay. It's probably junk mail, and as Smartie said, if it's important then they'll write to you again.

[crab]

You have to pay for it and tell us what it is.

[basstard]

Diggeh, I've been on the 'sending' end of one of these whoopsies.

One of my friends had a sister whose birthday was coming up, and having a hard time at school. It was unlikely she'd be getting a flood of cards and stuff, and she loved lollipops, so I decided to post her three in a normal envelope.

What I wasn't sure about was the postage costs for random objects, and I didn't have time to get to a Post Office. So I shoved one or two first class stamps on it [can't remember, suspect it was 2] and stuck it in a post box.

Turns out up to 60g is fine for a certain number of first class stamps, above that you need more. I was like 2g over, and she had to go down and pay for 8p worth of stamps or summat. All my mistake, and I squared her up for it.

The moral being - it's most likely just an innocent soul who wasn't aware of the postage weight limit regs. And also to take any vaugely heavy / important letter to an actual post office for official weighing/being stamped.

Now you're piqued our curiosity, please see what it is [it's not exactly a fortune, if you want I'll paypal you the £1.05] and enlighten us all.


edit - If you don't know the name, then don't pay. It's probably junk mail, and as Smartie said, if it's important then they'll write to you again.

I can't see a big corporation getting something like this wrong. The point of junk mail is you get to see it, and they're not going to make many customers if you have to pay for the postage.

[Laketop]

No handeling fees here! AHAHAAHAH :) :) :) LOL! AMERICAAAA!!!!

hey. can somebody explain the curnncey system there in Great Britain?

Pounds, shillings, pees??? EXPLAIN SO I CAN KNOW!!!

[carpefula]

Pounds and pennies.... there's one hundred pennies (pence) in a pound.

That's about it.

[Anenome]

edit -

I can't see a big corporation getting something like this wrong. The point of junk mail is you get to see it, and they're not going to make many customers if you have to pay for the postage.


That's exactly what I thought, you can mostly rule out junk mail and bills.

[Dude]

The PO is in a dire situation at the moment. They're having problems with budgets, for example, my parents get 6k a year from them. It's total bollocks.

The thing is, they don't have the money for you to underpay 5p. If everyone in the UK were to underpay 5p that'd be a fuckload of money gone.

[Anenome]

What is it for an average letter?
It's like 56 cents Canadian...I'm curious if it's more or less in the UK.

[Dude]

30p 1st class stamp.

[Oooh Yeah]

all you have to do is cut the post mans breaks.. going down the hill on his morning rounds delivering his letters and pissing people off with his handling fee.

THEN BAM!

"OH NOES MY BRAKES!!"

he's going so fast he struggles to turn, in a last second attempt to dodge a car he jerks the handle bars and goes flying into the tarmac.

leaving quite a nasty graze on his knee.. i think that the break replacement should sufficiently cover the cost of your letter.. the grazed knees are just a bonus.

[1kcattiesofgold]

Royal mail is at least partially privatized, right? They're trying to do that here in Japan too. Stupid idea as the Japan Post has a net profit every year. There is an election tonight that will decide the fate of Japan Post and it's looking good for being privatized. I guess this is the type of service I have to look forward to...

Thanks a lot, President Bush, for opening your fat yap and insisting that Japan privatize (I wish I was kidding).

[Geek Grrrl]

I too got one of these cards. Id bought something from ebay, paid the person £3 p&p, and they didnt pay the full amount of postage!! I had to go down to the post office and pay an extra £1.50 (or some other similar amount). one was not impressed.

[Oooh Yeah]

why not steal something equal to that value from the post office.. steal a few biros.

[!!!]

DID YOU PAY?!

WHAT WAS THE LETTER ABOUT!?

You can't leave us without knowing, man!
Too bad Patrick, you'll never know.

[lattherobogirl]

well, we never get our posrt until aboput m2 and our old postie went crazy, horded letters, stole the money from them and dumped them all in a lake :s

[Tweekish]

Soon the postal service will be open to competition, then we shall see how good they really are. We dont get our post until the afternoon, occasionally ive got back from work and passed the postman sloping off down our road.

I feel you pain digga, I had that done to me too when I was at Uni. I didnt have a car, and the sorting office was a few miles away. I was too lazy to walk there and they wouldnt answer the phone so I could get it dropped off at our local postoffice. Turns out, it was from my mum sending me something that I had really wanted to keep safe so I had left it at home. She posted it on to me but not put enough stamps on.

I never did get it back, and now I cant even remember what it was :(

[Oooh Yeah]

perhaps it was your memory