Tedd-Z
07-01-2004, 08:58 PM
I was attacked twenty-five times by a mugger with short-term amnesia!
I've installed a new waterbed and I feel seasick!
My dentist was kidnapped by the tooth fairy!
The dog ate my car keys so I'm gonna have to hitch-hike to the vet!
I didn't take the day off! I was having an eight-hour long cigarette break!
I've found out that the job is interfering with my drinking!
I can't come today cos I'll be stalking my previous employer who fired me for not turning up for work!
I thought I wanted a job, but it turns out I just want the money!
This infection affects my computer hand, not my beer arm!
I may not have graduated from Oxford, but I did pass out there a few times!
I'm not used to being with a woman I don't have to inflate!
I feel intimidated! You can do this for a living!
I did sleep with her, but I never stopped looking at my watch! I seemed to go on for hours compared to you!
I don't deserve you, so I tried someone else!
I'm not used to being with someone else!
It's not lipstick on my collar! I was standing next to a teenager and his spot exploded!
It's not someones phone number, it's their VAT number!
I did send you flowers direct from Amsterdam, but they must have got caught in customs!
How was I supposed to know it was alive? It didn't struggle when I flushed it!
We had to put the dog down! It didn't suffer! In fact, if you rush to the window, it's probably still falling!
You can write as many parking tickets as you like! I stole the car anyway!
I was gonna write earlier, but I've been snowed under! PS: Sorry to hear about your death!
I wasn't spreading rumours, but I know someone who is!
I need ten hours of sleep a day! Eight at night!
The dog ate my work, so I ate the dog!
I've installed a new waterbed and I feel seasick!
My dentist was kidnapped by the tooth fairy!
The dog ate my car keys so I'm gonna have to hitch-hike to the vet!
I didn't take the day off! I was having an eight-hour long cigarette break!
I've found out that the job is interfering with my drinking!
I can't come today cos I'll be stalking my previous employer who fired me for not turning up for work!
I thought I wanted a job, but it turns out I just want the money!
This infection affects my computer hand, not my beer arm!
I may not have graduated from Oxford, but I did pass out there a few times!
I'm not used to being with a woman I don't have to inflate!
I feel intimidated! You can do this for a living!
I did sleep with her, but I never stopped looking at my watch! I seemed to go on for hours compared to you!
I don't deserve you, so I tried someone else!
I'm not used to being with someone else!
It's not lipstick on my collar! I was standing next to a teenager and his spot exploded!
It's not someones phone number, it's their VAT number!
I did send you flowers direct from Amsterdam, but they must have got caught in customs!
How was I supposed to know it was alive? It didn't struggle when I flushed it!
We had to put the dog down! It didn't suffer! In fact, if you rush to the window, it's probably still falling!
You can write as many parking tickets as you like! I stole the car anyway!
I was gonna write earlier, but I've been snowed under! PS: Sorry to hear about your death!
I wasn't spreading rumours, but I know someone who is!
I need ten hours of sleep a day! Eight at night!
The dog ate my work, so I ate the dog!