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3v1l |\/|1NiOn
25-05-2006, 03:58 PM
We can't deny Big Brother is back, no matter how much we want to. We sit here, pleased that we haven't heard a thing about what those freaks of nature are getting up to; when suddenly a bloody NEWS REPORT sees some national news reject reading the local news, or the 4am news, covering in immense detail what is happening in the 'Big Bruvva owwse.' No no no, I've got news for you: No-one actually gives a shit - and anyone that does doesn't deserve to be told.

Now I will admit, it was a good idea to begin with and I did watch the first season when it was new and interesting. It even has a clever name, stemming from George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four, which means someone with some intelligence was behind it at some point. But what has it given us since then? Jade Goody, thats what. Which is hardly a credible excuse for its existance.

I was sitting the other day. Just sitting, not watching Big Brother, when the thought of it crept into my mind, uninvited and unwanted. I kept it there for some moment, teasing it, pretending I was interested; when I thought: Big Brother: Deathmatch! which is how this idea came about.

An island is acquired, somehow (possibly through invasion), and it must be at least 4 miles in diameter for this to work. We then dump roughly 100 typical Big Brother contestants on this island that is set up for warfare. I'm talking tanks, automatic weapons, knives, bunkers - the whole shabang. The simple rule will be: Last Man Standing; but just imagine the possibilities: alliances will be formed, divisions will occur, backstabbing will be rife. And all this will be to win the ultimate prize: to get off the island alive. Which means all of the money gained from the paying to watch (of course, gold like this is not going to be free) can go to its founder: me!

I honestly can't think how this is a bad idea. The people that apply will be standard trash, so we won't miss them. It could run on for weeks, or even years, so the entertainment value will be very very high.

Any TV executives willing to put my idea into practice, give me a call. I'm sure we can come to some sort of agreement on cost.

Zhyl
25-05-2006, 06:23 PM
the whole shabang

Don't you mean the whole Shabaz? I don't watch it, but it is unavoidable with so many people talking about it.

Nice article anyways. Reminds me of an advert on GTA:III.

Swirl
25-05-2006, 06:28 PM
Model the characters in HL2: DM and make a 'Big Brother' mod :)

Lozzie Stardust
25-05-2006, 06:52 PM
They might not take you up on it as it's already kinda been done in movie form.

junior
25-05-2006, 06:55 PM
Battle Royale FTW.

lynzog
25-05-2006, 08:22 PM
An island is acquired, somehow (possibly through invasion), and it must be at least 4 miles in diameter for this to work. We then dump roughly 100 typical Big Brother contestants on this island that is set up for warfare.
Isn't this Lost?

3v1l |\/|1NiOn
25-05-2006, 08:27 PM
Isn't this Lost?

Vaguely - However we all know Lost isn't real - we can be entertained by the fact that the death and maiming we see is completely for our enjoyment

lynzog
26-05-2006, 11:19 PM
Ah! So its like Big brother 5 AND lost :)