Black Nail Polish

[Sorcha]

Now, before someone goes and deletes my topic, please read the whole thing, it's a good subject. (Well, I think so anyway.)

Throughout my near 16 years of existance I have been pondering the question; Are we all the same? To this I say; We are all unique; Just like everyone else. I have also observed many traits and behaviours that people have expressed over these 16 years. One thing I still don't understand is why people (perticulary girls) paint their nails black. And I'm meaning, other people than gothics. I first thought that their painted their nails black to be 'cool' and individual. But then I realised that if everyone paints their nails black, you can't really be individual. Is this anomaly some cosmic coincidence and everyone just doesn't notice what colour other's nails are? Or is it simply conforming to non-conformity?

Why is it that the people who claim to be individual aren't really that much different? Is uncool once again cool? Does the deffinition of non-conformity need to be changed now seeing as these days it's cool not to conform (thus making it conforming...)?

The purpose of this post is for me to find out what everyone's opinions on conforming etc.

Is there a difference between conforming, non-conforming, individuality and being yourself?

[Ashling]

lol!!!!!!! I know exactly what you mean! a while ago I had this HUGE urge to buy some black nail polish, so I got the bus all the way to the shops and spent over an hour looking around all the shops looking for somewhere that sold some. In the end I found some for $2.50.... but thats not the point

Anyway in my group of friends at school I was the only one that had black nail polish, so think I felt that it made me slightly different in some way, and I dunno... made me 'cooler' even if other people wore it. A lot of people in my group wear the same sorts of clothes and I suppose doing this made me different in a way, even though I dress much the same as them.

You see (here I am really spilling my lifes secrets to people I dont even know), back in junior school and even now I have never really managed to fit in all that much, and was always a try hard and everything. So naturally I wanted to be cool, and in the 'in' crowd, and if wearing black nail polish made me feel cooler and made me fit in, by not fitting in (if you know what I mean) then so be it.

hehe thats like in the Monty Python movie where there was a huge group of people chanting "we are all individuals, we are all individuals" and then this guy yells out from the corner "I'm not!"

[ZekeyLizard]

Individual v.s. Conformity

Hmmmm.

Well lets see.
I am a 6'2" latino guy who draws comics and makes art and does hilarious stand-up comedy whenever he is pissed. I also do pretty good impressions and have almost no shame whatsoever.
But I read all the time.
I love books.


Did I ask thee, creator,
From mine clay,
To mold me man?



I am most definetely an individual.
Unfortunately being a not-very-goth guy I wear no nailpolish.

[Sorcha]

Haha, I love that part of MP. :)

I agree with you, it's good to feel as though you fit in, cos that's what I'd been trying to do for most of life because I was sick of being teased and what-not cos I was weird or whatever. But now, I just want to be myself. Once you can free yourself from the opression of what other people think of you, they seem to respect you even more for just being yourself. I think being yourself is different to being an individual because lots of people can be individual or non-conform but they're only like that cos they don't know who they are. But there are also people who are truly individual... such as myself. I have the weirdest taste in every aspect of life and I'm a very loopy girl indeed.

And for anyone who's wondering, I don't wear black nail polish, I wear silver ice nail polish. :D No one wears silver ice nail polish.

[piemanmoo]

I think girls worry too much about fashion.

[squealpiggy]

It's a basic human tribal urge. Teenagers tend to submit to it more than adults but lots of adults do too, but it's not so much a case of being unique, it's more a case of belonging. The girls (and boys) who wear black nail polish want to belong to the group that values being unique especially highy. To be a sheep is the lowest thing, but the irony is that in trying to be unique they are just wearing another tribal uniform.

Then of course there's the people that wear black nail polish because they like it. Though I would question why making it look like a piano lid has dropped on your fingers would be desirable.

[Ferret Pie]

That's a + Piggy. Indeed, teenagers often do want to all be the same, thus they wear horrible clothes because everyone else is. I haven't really noticed girls wearing black nail polish tho, couple of boys... maybe it's just because where I live most people are townies ... too near romford maybe.

[nutnoodle]

Originally posted by piemanmoo
I think girls worry too much about fashion.

Not all girls. I've never worn make-up in my life and my "friend" told me the other day that my top was "so last year".

I just laughed at her. I couldn't really care about fashion myself. There are more important things in life. There are better ways to be unique than what you are wearing.

Plus it means I have more money. :)

[mm pretty dress]

How you dress is important in the sense that, along with your physical appearance, it is unfortunately something you are going to be judged on by all of the people you will ever encounter.

All the people you've ever walked past & not spoken to will have looked at you & made a judgement on your likely character going on how you appear visually. & you will have done it to them.

I think it comes from the instinct to stay alive. In order to stay alive you will need to avoid danger & seek out things that will benefit you e.g.
people who could cause you harm or people you wouldn’t want to associate with & people you will want to associate with for social grooming & potential mating.

Black nail polish is like any other item of clothing/accessory, it’s just a visual communication device.

If you just wear what you like you can't go wrong.

Doseone says
Of course I'm different from everybody else now
& yes I’m just like everybody else
We are all the same
We are all people!

[Rogue]

i think black nail polish is awful.

Being 20 years old, i cannot remember the series of thoughts that went into my head when i was 13 and bought some black nail polish.

I am just glad I am past that.

[GorillaBearBear]

Originally posted by mm pretty dress (by Doseone)
Yes I am Different from everybody else
and yes I am the same as everybody else
We are all the same
We are all People

I love that quote. It says evrythign I think needs to be said about this: We are all the same because we are all individuals - regardless of how we look. Just where whatever the hell you think looks cool and you'll be fine.

[Panto]

The weird thing is, for the last couple of years it's been fashionable to be an 'individual', so surely the people who try to appear individual by wearing certain things are being the most comformist

[bionic sheep]

Every 'cool' boy in my school wears hair gel, simply because it is banned. If it was part of the uniform to wair hair gel, no-one would. It is cool to break the rules to a certain extent. However, if someone took it too far and wore their hair bright pink in a mohican, that would not be 'cool'. It seems you have to be uniformedly different in order to fit in.

Black nail-varnish is strange. If you wear it, you are conforming in a non-conformist way, which (according to the 'cool' people) makes you 'cool'. However, if you are don't, you are not conforming to fashion in a conformist way. This is weird, as this isn't 'cool' even if everyone else in the world is wearing black nail varnish in order to appear non-conformist. If you wear black nail varnish, you are negating the point of being non-conformist by conforming to another set of rules anyway.

Put simply: Wear what you like. S**t happens. What the hell. :D

[elliekinz]

people wear black nail varnish so they can say they belong, which i think is pointless because at the end of the day you arn't anyone else but you, and by saying you are in a group your just hiding that. if you were black nail varnish because you want to people assume that you are trying to be in a group and catatgorise you. when you are in a group you have to live up to everyones standards to stay there, thats why its pointless! if you spend to much time trying to be something your not your going to be sad and loanly when everyone ditches you because you are not up with the trends!

[mini_ninja_pir8]

Originally posted by ZekeyLizard
Individual v.s. Conformity

Hmmmm.

Well lets see.
I am a 6'2" latino guy who draws comics and makes art and does hilarious stand-up comedy whenever he is pissed. I also do pretty good impressions and have almost no shame whatsoever.
But I read all the time.
I love books.


Did I ask thee, creator,
From mine clay,
To mold me man?



I am most definetely an individual.
Unfortunately being a not-very-goth guy I wear no nailpolish.

zekey... i want you..

really. ;)

anyhoo...

Put simply: Wear what you like. S**t happens. What the hell.

exactly!!!! a good point

[SweetDreams]

well, peopel are always saying that goths are trying to be different and individuals, but that they're all the same, if this is true, anyone who tries to be different isn't really an individual, so shoul we remove the word "individual" from the english language?

no, we shouldn't, i believe that being an individual is being one thing that nobody else is, altho it can be, but goths in my books, are individuals, they hide form society, i go out, i see probably 2 goths all day, this is the city centre i mean, 2 goths, maybe 3 or 4, they hide away form society and are the minority, they're individuals, osama bin laden is an individual because he is the only one who has led a group of terrorists to hijack 747's and crash them into the new york world trade centres, individual, but bakc to the black nailpolish thing, i do it sometimes, but because everyone jsut does all thier nails blakc, isometiem jsut do 3 or 4 nails, like one on the elft 2 or 3 on thew right, and scrathc a bit off to make em look worn, so i'm a little different form most people, face it, most of us liek being different

[Sorcha]

Woohoo! So many responses. :D I am very happy.

I would love to quote certain bits of all your posts but that would take me too long, you all rock!

My example of black nail polish was simply a metaphor and I think most of you got it (I hope) cos I don't just mean black nail polish I meant everything to do with appearance; black nail polish was just the first thing that came to my mind that fitted.

Personally, I try to keep up with the latest trends in fashion and whatnot, but I also try alot harder to make a statement/customise my look and make old trends look cool. And many people tell me I pull it off so, yay for me!

I try to always look my best. If I look in the mirror and think "omg you're not seriously going to wear that out are you?" then I will get changed. Just because I know what other people will think of me. I try to make good impressions.

[Mexican Pie]

If girls think that going Gothic makes them a total individual, too late.

Many people who wanted to be individuals now make up the Gothic franchise.

[elliekinz]

there's no such thing as an individual now because everyone wants to be in a group. i know lads who wear black nail varnish because they claim to be different, but they arn't, thay are just like everyone else, because everyone else is trying to be different.

[Chookmeister]

I think there's a difference in being individual and being unique. You can't be entirely unique, but you can be individual by being how you genuinely want to be.

[notmarcie]

I am totally unique and individiual and if you disagree my army of clones will kick your heads in.

[Dr-Electro]

Very funny, Notmarcie. You need a bigger army of clones to kick my head in. My head is extremely large and extremely hard.:D

(a dragon's head makes a good battering ram against a stone wall. the stone loses every time. :) )

Ok, my persona on these forums is that of a dragon who morphs to human everyday to go to work. In real life, I am a fairly large man, salt and pepper beard, moderately balding, a slight pot belly (gravity sucks harder as you get older) and there is nobody else around here who looks like me, acts like me, or dresses like me. That is not necessarily by conscious choice on my part. I am what I am and the clothes fit my budget, not somebody else's fashion whims.

Does any of this qualify me as an individual? Not necessarily so. There are plenty of other people in this world of ours who are in a very similar if not the same situation. I still dress and behave like a member of my generaton. My generation is older and more staid than it was in my youth, but that changes nothing.

Your generation has a tendency to conform to generational standards, regardless how many standards exist for your generation. Goth is goth, punk is punk, street gang is street gang, and middle of the road is still white bread. I was pretty much a white bread kid. Trust me, there is not one thing wrong with that. If you live a lifestyle that is markedly different from mine, fine! Diversity makes the world more interesting. If you dislike me for living a lifestyle different from yours, the problem is yours, not mine. I can deal with being me. I can deal with your being yourself. No problem, ok?

Where individuality really comes to play is the way in which we FUNDAMENTALLY differ from each other. I have short hair, which is leaving my head and starting to grow in places where it never grew before, like inside my ears. I have a beard that looks not exactly like any other beard I have ever seen. I didn't make it that way, it grows that way naturally. I was once a very muscular fellow. I was a genuine warrior of the jungle variety and as previously stated elsewhere, the meanest bad ass in the valley of the shadow of death. Now, I just resemble an old man.

All of that combined with my background, upbringing, home environment, work and school history, past and present associations and any other environmental factors you wish to add in, are what make me an individual. Not one other living person in the eitire world has experienced the exact same set of experiences that I have experienced. Each and every one of you kids can make the same statement, word for word if you wish, and it will hold exactly as true for you as it does for me.

Sit and talk to me for five or ten minutes and I will begin to pick out the individual traits in you. I mean those that are less obvious thn the color of your nails and hair.

Side note: The kids at the school where I work like to paint their nails black and white. Different patterns, similar patterns, random patterns, it makes no difference. Black and White are our school colors! So there for conformity! Even the few goth kids we have match teh color scheme.:D

[Alomie]

I thought black nail varnish was cool, when i was 12. but now i'm mmuch happier watching films and being with my friends, i have red hair and i stick out like a sore thumb. mainly cause i really loud, but people like my honesty.

but i don't fit in. i wish i did, but i don't

[Dr_nwa]

I'm a bloke who has worn black nail polish. did that make me individual? NO! I used to listen to death metal, dress entirely in black and hate my parents for repressing me. that did not make me an indivdual either. at this point in my life, all i was trying to do was be different, but by becoming a goth, I just conformed to a non conformist comformality. (btw this was while I was at school...)
Now, I wear whichever clothes i want to, i buy music that i like, i do pretty much whatever i want to. i do not try to be an indivdual now but i am happier than i was while i was at school and trying hard to achieve an indivduality.Now I feel more like my own person because its what i want to do, not what other people suggest that i should do.
I understand why people go for a different identity, but whatever you do it has always been done before and there are other people who do the same as you.
If you look at 'non-conformist' cultures throughout the last 40 odd years, each one has been a group of people wearing the same clothes, listening to the same music, doing the same things, but being seen by society as non conformist. the Hippies, Punks, Teddy boys all fall into this, as they followed the non conformist trend at their time.
Happiness in your own self-image is the most important thing. As long as you are happy, why give a shit if you conform or not? I know goths who are happy with their image and i know trendies who are the same. fair play to them i say, be yourself.