Finish the sentence!

['Ello Guv'ner]

Saggy Bewbs." the H Bomb is then...

[Emptyspraycan]

nicked by an overweight policeman.The policeman was running away with the H bomb, but...

[Pie hunter D]

somehow absorbed it, concluding in a comedy explosion of epic proportions. Mildly amused the main protaganist...

[Emptyspraycan]

mimed a laugh, because he was a mime and could not speak. This caused...

['Ello Guv'ner]

Lots of cheese to rain from the sky. this was a problem...

[Charming]

and could only be solved by a team of fat/ sweaty/ spotty Nerds. However, before the problem could be fixed the Alpha Nerd was challenged by a lesser Nerd to a...

['Ello Guv'ner]

Duel on World of Warcraft. the lesser nerd had been practicing his whole WoW Life for this moment and was...

[Charming]

victorious. Despite emerging as the bruised and bloodied winner of this fierce battle and new Alpha Nerd, no fickle-but-hot females rushed to mate with him because everyone knows that...

['Ello Guv'ner]

Nerds have microscopic willy's. His only reward for the victory was...

[Charming]

to have his foot impaled on a sea urchin's bottom. This is considered a rare delicacy in many places, particularly in the heart of...

[carrotcake]

Mianus. Mianus is a place where gay animals can roam free and...

[Pie hunter D]

have unlimited sexy time with inanimate objects like...

[bob-rox]

scissors, although the government of Mianus will eventually ban it. The sea urchin...

[carrotcake]

king was a jolly fellow. He liked to twang his...

[Charming]

big, bushy bum-moustache, and what a pretty tune it played! It went a little something like...

[carrotcake]

twang twang twang. Sometimes he liked to...

[wiggle_queen]

use gold plated tweezers to perfect the shape of the bum moustache. Apparently gold plated tweezers...

[Haroshi]

were made of gold. which caused the king to...

[wiggle_queen]

jump for joy, because the tweezers he paid a fiver for were actually solid gold and would revive his country's flagging economy. Chancellor....

[Pie hunter D]

Palpatine started formulating a plt to overthrow the king and take the tweezers for himself with the aid of...

[Giant_Crab]

a giant, hovering, gas-powered, ultra-violent mindsquid, which...

[Charming]

was pink. However, the mindsquid was unhappy because he felt that pink wasn't a very intimidating colour and wanted to have plastic surgery to make his...

[Chris]

erm...COCK HUGE!...
This led to...

[Pie hunter D]

huge complications for Palpatine when the squid got amourous and tried to hump him senseless without using...

[Charming]

any fancy shoes to do a mating dance beforehand. As a result of being humped without any dancing, poor Palpatine became pregnant and a few minutes later gave birth to...

[Chris]

Luke Skywalker...
This didn't make any sense so the Galaxy decided to...

[TheMattfish]

dress in drag and do the hula, which resulted in...

[Emptyspraycan]

some seriously cool surfer dudes...

[Giant_Crab]

exploding, musically, due to the giant, vibrating...

[Pie hunter D]

effigy of jesus hanging on the deathstar wall pumping out vicious amounts of german techno from...

[Emptyspraycan]

his ears. Unfortunately the surfer didn't like german techno music, and...

[Giant_Crab]

drank through it, for decades, resulting in bowel...

[Pie hunter D]

churning shits for years to come. Giggles, however, were few and far between because..

[Turbocharged]

Luke Skywalker imploded due to the dense concentration of dog eggs. This of course, could only mean...

[Giant_Crab]

that life FOUND a way. Which is deeply confusing and erotic, considering...

[brabbus]

that micheal jackson found it first using his...

[Emptyspraycan]

nose. That's right, he pulled off his nose and...

[Giant_Crab]

inserted it into an unsuspecting whale's cleft. The whale, mortified, plotted to off MJ in the most violent and imaginative way possible, and the plan went like this...

[TheMattfish]

tv I to own, right out the 11th floor window, which reminds me...

[Emptyspraycan]

I need a new TV. So I walked down the street, but was assaulted by a small german...

[Giant_Crab]

named 'murderous Klaus', whose favourite weapon was a salami wrapped in concrete, discovered only in...

[TheMattfish]

MY PANTS, which incidentally...

[carrotcake]

Have no taste or style, just like the person who wears them. Suddenly...

[Giant_Crab]

DANGER HAPPENED, enlivening arms everywhere, resulting in...

[TheMattfish]

a dance off, see spot run style, where...

[Emptyspraycan]

someone did something seriously funksky. The coming danger could only be stopped by...

[ARGUHUH]

Danger Quencher, a penguin with a lightbulb for a head, whose special power was...

[Emptyspraycan]

having a lightbulb for a head, duh. But a chav threw a rock, breaking his lightbulb head...

[Giant_Crab]

which was replaced by a mounted cannon, which demolished the chav. Mounted-cannon-face went on to become the president of...

[Kali]

the royal gay society, they all had a jolly good time frolicking about...

[brabbus]

in china, where they met the pandas and had...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

a lovely cup a green tea together. But unfortunately.......

[Kakarrrrr]

they spilled the tea over the panda, which caused...

[Emptyspraycan]

him to scream and go into a savage rage mode. He attacked a large, swiss...

[Charming]

shirtless male model. The delicious model screamed in a girly voice "Oh noooo! Mai beautiful face! It is...

[Emptyspraycan]

melting!''. ''Holy poop!'' exclaimed a small, rabid...

[Giant_Crab]

electric eel, as his organs swelled in the gaseous environment...

[Charming]

and the eel began to float. Some Victorian dandies came across the floaty eel and proceeded to use him like a hot air balloon, having little picnics in him consisting of...

[Emptyspraycan]

just sandwiches. ''How dull...'' said...

[Kakarrrrr]

some random posh bloke, as he wandered by, unaware that...

[Emptyspraycan]

a giant DINOSAUR was right behind him...

[Giant_Crab]

masturbating furiously, causing...

[Kakarrrrr]

a massive tremor which...

[Giant_Crab]

caused world destroying volcanic eruptions...

[Kakarrrrr]

which were really made of...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

cheese. But not swiss like we were expecting. It was instead.........

[Kakarrrrr]

goat's cheese, disguised as swiss cheese. This outraged many people, causing

[~Crazy Penguin~]

outrage. But, then, the most catastrophic thing happened.......

[Kakarrrrr]

when a goat ate it's own cheese, causing it to...

[TheMattfish]

expand to gigantic proportions, allowing...

[Giant_Crab]

all molecular bonds in the universe to break down, which, of course, led to...

[Kakarrrrr]

the dinosaur to stop fapping, he ate the posh bloke and then...

[harryashfield]

set fire to a dog, which ran about for a bit and then...

[Emptyspraycan]

died. After this rebellious act, the dinosaur...

[Matt]

Went to a slavic prisoner of war camp and found...

[Giant_Crab]

an ape eating grapes under a drape, listening to Nick Drake, by the lake, lecturing on...

[Matt]

congestion charge. Later, the dinosaur would go on to be a famous...

[Charming]

stripper at Spearmint Hippos exclusive clubby club. But before he became the best poledancey reptile alive he had to go on a mystical quest for...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

a spoon. whenhe found the spoon, he took it to........

[Sparkeycat]

Disneyland, where Mickey Mouse stole the spoon, ate it, and said...

[Kakarrrrr]

nothing much, really, however at the same time at the hill a new king was crowned...

[Cydonia]

......and a bomb went off exposing his underwear. Complaining, and whining he....

[Charming]

merrily tripp'd it up the stairs to fetch a bottle of rum for the dame. Dame Hokey was in no mood to wait for her rum so she grabbed a sharp and pointy fork and...

[Emptyspraycan]

polished it until it wsa shiny new! ''Hoorah!'' cheered...

[Cydonia]

.... all the imported monkeys! And then they ran...

[Charming]

and they ran and they ran until they collapsed and died of exhaustion, much to the Victorian crowd's amusment. "Come on everyone!" cried the gentleman with muttonchops "let's all go to the insane asylum and...

[Cydonia]

....rape all the curtains we can find!" The others tried to....

[Charming]

get lucky with the cushions and divan in the corner but were coldly refused the joy of sexytimes. Sir Winston of Celery, on le other hand, managed to loosen the pool table's tongue with a little champagne and proceeded to gently...

[Cydonia]

....lick within the armpits of a rather lovely lamp exposing what was under the lampshade. A guy named Brush rushes in quite horrified, yelling "I hate Porcelain" and then continues to...

[Charming]

D.A.N.C.E like there's no tomorrow. Moonwhile, somewhere in the vast reaches of West Africa, a man was eating a yam; he chewed it slowly, very, very slowly and whilst he chewed he also...

[Cydonia]

broke his jaw and bled all over the ground! A dog came along...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

and slipped. But luckily.......

[Emptyspraycan]

Dogs always land on their feet. ''Stupid dog!'' shouted an angry but confused...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

chicken. Who at that very moment was about to..........

[Giant_Crab]

perform heart surgery on an alligator, using a bread knife. This...

[Mr Whippy]

Method is commonly used during international candle wax week (Finland) where...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

clearly candles are involved. Although this year was, there was also a......

[StumpyMcGoat]

documentery narrated by David Attenborugh on the...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

common household cat. Upon finishing, he suddenly....

[darkfoot_727]

jizzed upon an arctic fox. The arctic fox then...

[StumpyMcGoat]

Puked on a brick made of...

[Insanity BenBoy]

Cheese. He wondered about the composition of the brickl and decided to...

[StumpyMcGoat]

complain to the highest authority who resided...

[Fezwald]

behind asda cark pack where the employees smoke. The highest authority spoke onto him...

[Noodles]

and said "please eat my shoes because ...

[StumpyMcGoat]

my wife forced me to wear them" They tasted like...

[Noodles]

salted prawns with a bad skin condition called...

[StumpyMcGoat]

Macmillant syndrome which causes...

[Fezwald]

those infected to have a rational hatred toward apple macs, the cure for this problem is

[~Crazy Penguin~]

oranges. But, although this method has not been proven in all cases........

[Insanity BenBoy]

the only other option was Windows. So he decided to...

[Cap'n Pie]

go on a killing spree to kill all apple macs and then teabag them when he is done. Then eat as many...

[darkfoot_727]

...ofthem as possible before being shot.....

[Meatballs]

...by the police ARU, who had been summoned by the crack fox, who told them that...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

his name was Fred. This not being his actual name, he then........

[harwin101]

Signed up to be on the next season of supermarket sweep with dale winton. while on the show......

[TheMattfish]

inspector jones discovered that he was, in fact, the reincarnate of....

[Emptyspraycan]

Zeus. ''Golly gosh'' said inspector Jones ''I've dropped my...

[woodchip50]

...face into a kettle". He then proceeded to...

[Quintumply]

lick every doorknob he could find, which was a habit of his when thinking intensely. A mountain goat suddenly appeared, wearing...

[TheMattfish]

a pair of fishnets that once belonged to Hugh Jackman, which hadn't been seen since...

[Emptyspraycan]

four o'clock this morning. The heroic goat leapt to inspector Jone's aid, trying to help him get his face out the kettle, but...

[Quintumply]

got a hoof stuck in the spout. This looks like a job for....

[combatking0]

...the local Goat Rescue And Protection Enforcement Service. After being saved by the GRAPES, the goat decided to...

[MishyMoo]

...thank them by taking them on holiday to the Sahara Desert but they dried out and became raisins. In a panic the goat...

[Altek]

kicked the camera on saddam's face. It ran into..

[CMG-UTOPIA]

a mine field where the explosion from the mines launced the goat into the air and landed in...

[Kotihyttynen]

...Poland. The surprised Polish thought this was declaration of war against them, and they...

[TheMattfish]

...decided to go to the supermarket to stock up on cheese, as in a time of war they would be unable to get any, which always...

[Emptyspraycan]

puts a dampener in their war plans. Poland quickly proceeded to take over Britain...

[Goshmo]

... but where shocked to find out Wales was part of Britain. They then cut Wales off of Mainland Britain and shipped it to...

[CMG-UTOPIA]

Africa, where they celebrate their new whale god by wearing the head pieces on their head so that the evil spirit could leave their tribe and not cause total damage by...

[~Crazy Penguin~]

staring in a horrible play. The director of the play was.......

[Digichris]

...A melted down fish who...

[TheMattfish]

rather did enjoy a nice spot of golf and...

[minisheep]

...directing bad plays, sudenly!...

[cheezruinzlivez]

...a fat black cat jumped on his head and...

[minisheep]

...had a wee until...

[Emptyspraycan]

a giant Bill Oddie made of gold fell on top of the fat black cat...

[Sypho]

...and stripped the cat of all his/her hairs...

[mat-tracteur561]

and sold them to jeremy clarkson in exchange for his time machine and his godly powers then preceeded to......

[TheMattfish]

rock the casbah...

[blueboy092]

then wanted to dance with a...

[mat-tracteur561]

giant cucumber who wanted to go to bognor regis because......

[magsie o skaw]

he had to execute...

[Zebedee]

the pandas. Crazed with power he...

[blueboy092]

Watched Lord of The Rings with his freind named...

[magsie o skaw]

dark helmet who ate all his...

[TheMattfish]

dragonfruit, which was a shame because the plantation...

[magsie o skaw]

has just been nuked by....

[Zebedee]

...a duck billed platypus which eats...

[GuitarGod]

cows in New Zealand. The farm..

[magsie o skaw]

which had an infestation of....

[Martini]

alcoholism, caused....

[magsie o skaw]

an epidemic the size of belgiums vast...

[mat-tracteur561]

waterway system that resembled a...

[Zebedee]

...small, stunned pigeon. An elephant...

[magsie o skaw]

with diarrhea did a poo all over....

[Martini]

the statue of....

[mat-tracteur561]

the great nosepicker of the south west and then...

[magsie o skaw]

the biggest Amoeba you ever saw...

[mat-tracteur561]

walked past to go to the corner shop owned by...

[magsie o skaw]

angus macgyver who sold....

[TheAmazingTom]

£30,000,000 of the finest quality...

[Vercci]

dildos made out of...

[magsie o skaw]

c-4 explosives borrowed from...

[Emptyspraycan]

a small arabian man named Khalesh, who...

[livewirekitty]

obviously didn't want anyone to sample...

[Ronbert]

his home-made chutney, because..

[Kaveman]

he scared of the rabbits, who once...

[TheMattfish]

on a merry-go-round attempted to fly-kick a ladybug as they were...

[magsie o skaw]

really bothering margret thatchers...

[mat-tracteur561]

thong makers some of witch went on strike because....

[magsie o skaw]

of union strikes caused by...

[Cpt.Killeman]

Anal explosion, brought about by....

[magsie o skaw]

itchy scrotums with especially bad cases in...

[mat-tracteur561]

A level mathmatics after they...

[Bombbob]

had eaten weeble's head. This turned out to be...

[mat-tracteur561]

weebl not weeble so....

[magsie o skaw]

bob cryed tears of.....

[mat-tracteur561]

joy as jeremy clarkson shot his cat and the preceded to...

[Zebedee]

fornicate with a peugeot 307 but...

[mat-tracteur561]

the peugeots wife a citroen found out and then...

[magsie o skaw]

buggered of to gumdrop lane in the land of chocolate which was ultimatly a mistake because....

[mat-tracteur561]

there is no pants in

[hynzytheweirdo]

Panama, however there are.....

[Marxist Pig]

plenty of boats, so naturally it was suggested that.....

[hynzytheweirdo]

the secret Government agents, in time of civil unrest, fly the Government and the Admiral's cat.....

[magsie o skaw]

to mt. doom where they compete in the annual...

[mat-tracteur561]

sheep shagging contest a practice normally found in...

[Zebedee]

northern, southern, western and eastern wales. also famed for...

[flicky1991]

being too close to england for my liking. This is why they should...

[MOONHITLER]

Relocate to Pluto, or any other...

[magsie o skaw]

place the shape of a pig head where there are no...

[flicky1991]

greyhounds that could accidentally...

[Zebedee]

explode when they get too excited by...

[Marxist Pig]

rubbing two sticks together, ofcourse this lead to the problem that

[Gregah]

Certain people do want to rub two...

[flicky1991]

parts of their body together in order to...

[mat-tracteur561]

make petrol in order to...

[Cpt.Killeman]

Use it to make marmite so that

[mat-tracteur561]

they can sort out who loves and hates it to sendt them to the cheddar wars wich was started because...

[noidtluom]

everybody doesn't actually like cheese, but pretend they do ...

[Skorne]

to keep the dairy farmers in business, because these farmers love to...

[flicky1991]

kill people who are too...

[Marxist Pig]

informal, but only because...

[flicky1991]

it said so on the sign, which was very...

[magsie o skaw]

helpful in letting us know...

[flicky1991]

that no-one could find the controls for the...

[Zebedee]

remote controlled pig that was originally designed to...

[Glitch]

run amok through the streets of liverpool, setting fire to...

[Marxist Pig]

old ladies, because after all they do.....

[Cpt.Killeman]

NIT SHREDIES in order to....

[magsie o skaw]

feed the masses in the land of hungry hungry hippos from....

[mat-tracteur561]

tescos whos sworn enemy are...

[flicky1991]

animators, who are known to...

[mat-tracteur561]

animate...

[flicky1991]

very crazy and slightly annoying...

[Zebedee]

wombles, such as...

[mat-tracteur561]

insanity prawn womble who's preferd past time is...



WOOOOOP 300th post:lets all have a wine and cheese party

[flicky1991]

yesterday, which is when...

btw I know you meant "pastime", but you didn't write that

[magsie o skaw]

eating dung balls from...

[mat-tracteur561]

urvagina came and...

[flicky1991]

destroyed the tower of...

[magsie o skaw]

matt561 so he retaliated by driving his...

[flicky1991]

tank into the golden hall owned by...

[mat-tracteur561]

craig charles who fell out with me because...

[flicky1991]

I tried to steal his best...

[magsie o skaw]

collection of beige...

[flicky1991]

trousers, which are very...

[mat-tracteur561]

much like...

[flicky1991]

the topping of the...

[mat-tracteur561]

fukin great big...

[flicky1991]

pizza eaten by...

[mat-tracteur561]

ja ja binks who's mate once...

[flicky1991]

stuffed a load of toothpicks into...

[mat-tracteur561]

that guy over there who...

[flicky1991]

is looking at a...

[mat-tracteur561]

a 40 lb box of...

[flicky1991]

beef pies, which were cooked by...

[Marxist Pig]

Hugh Fer$nley Whittingstall but he's a bit of a....

[dead-smiley]

challenge when it comes to...

[magsie o skaw]

making the beef from cows so...

[Zebedee]

he makes beef out of...

[flicky1991]

the gunk he finds in...

[mat-tracteur561]

whats underneith ovens a bit like...

[flicky1991]

toothpaste, but it's less...

[dead-smiley]

minty, unlike lemon...

[magsie o skaw]

covered in mint and left out in a hole in the ...

[mat-tracteur561]

second vagina of...