Monty Python and the Holy Grail!!!!!

[dead]

everyone who know's me would know i would have to start this. so i did. i say it is the best film ever. it has man-eating rabbits,strange enchanters, french people and some crazy random violence. who can't love it???
but what is the best line of the film??? that is the question. i think it goes to:
King of swamp castle: some day lad, all this will be yours.
King of Swamp Castles son: what, the curtains???
genius.

[prodigy69]

"Strange women lying in ponds, distributing swords is no basis for a system of government" :D

just one of the many great lines

[vampiress]

DENNIS: Listen -- strange women lying in ponds distributing
swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive
power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some
farcical aquatic ceremony.
ARTHUR: Be quiet!
DENNIS: Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power
just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!
ARTHUR: Shut up!
DENNIS: I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an empereror just
because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd
put me away!
ARTHUR: Shut up! Will you shut up!
DENNIS: Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.
ARTHUR: Shut up!
DENNIS: Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system!
HELP! HELP! I'm being repressed!
ARTHUR: Bloody peasant!
DENNIS: Oh, what a give away. Did you here that, did you here
that, eh? That's what I'm on about -- did you see him repressing
me, you saw it didn't you?


just reading it make me smile. you know, you get kicked out of malls yelling "Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system!
HELP! HELP! I'm being repressed!" mall securty does not find it funny. even less so if you are an american in a canadian mall.

[prodigy69]

yea that's the one :)

[Boyinabox]

I love the bit where the knights make a "Trojan" rabbit to enter the castle but then forget to enter it.


Laughed so hard!!!

[dead]

i am alsao partial to trhe knights of the round table song.
we're the knights of the round table
We dance, whenever we're able
we do routines and chorus scenes,
with footwork impeccable

but many times we're given rymes[/can't spell]
that are quite unsingable
we dine well here in camelot
we eat ham and jam and spam a lot

we're opera mad in camelot
i sing from the diaphragm a lo,

i war we're tough and able
quite indeffategable
beetween our quests,
we sequin vests and impersnate clark gable

it's a busy life in camelot
I have to push the prrrraaammm a lllooottt...

arthur: On secomd thoughts, lets not go to camelot. it is a silly place.

[eXtremer]

ARTHUR:
Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home.
Let us ride... to... Camelot!

*the knights' song*

ARTHUR:
Well, on second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.


oh, and the Knight Who Say 'Ni' are just hilarious.

[dead]

we are no longer the knights who say " ni", we are now the knights who say.... "ecci ecci ecci badang boken dowzer"
*NOTE: the words may be spelt differently, but they are to that sound*

[Dr S]

Everyone I came across seemed to like Holy Grail but I just didn't find it all that funny, especially after all the hype I had heard.
I thought Life of Brian was much funnier.

[jimjimjimjimjim]

WOOO for the Black knight And the Evil killer Rabbit.

Bill:"LOOK AT TYHE BOOOONNES".

Black Knight:"Tis but a scratch".
KA:"No its not your arms off".
Black knight:"No its not"
KA:"Yes it is"
Black Knight:"Only a Flesh wound"

[eidderf]

http://bau2.uibk.ac.at/sg/python/Scripts/HolyGrail/MontyPythonandtheHolyGrail
Look at this I found the script. It is so funny but when it ended I waited for ages. It is very funny and random. Its not all of it but still good.

[freddiestarfish]

"Get on with it"
-many thousands of people

[Flea]

Ahh the French are the best. You smelly-english types.

[dead]

you dappy english kenigets! i fart in your general direction, your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberies, now go away, or i will taunt you a second time!!! i unglog my nose at you!!!
on a later note, there are lots of new forum areas, aren't there?? three.

[RamblinYeti]

"We are now, no longer the knights who say Ni.. We are now the Knights who say....Eki, Eki, Eki, Eki, Fatang, Zoopoing......Ni" -Sorry -had to do it-the holy grail is brill best python movie by far in my opinion

[djnrrd]

I recommend watching the DVD with the added bonus subtitles for people who don't like the film.

Adding an even extra random hilarious factor to an already random film :)

[dead]

i have the dvd with tonnes of extras. there are so many i won't list them all, but they inclde :
three mindless singalongs
documentary on the uses of cocnuts
lego knights vesion
tonnes of crazy stuff.

[RamblinYeti]

In my humble opinion the lego knights version of knights of the round table is one of the est dvd extras ever

[dead]

i love the bit of the song where the prisoner claps his hands in the dungeon. hilarious. that's also in the lego one, but with a skeleton.

[Explosivo]

the best bit has 2 be when they get to the bridge of death and they ask arthor the questions

What is your name

i am king arthor king of the britians

what is you quest

i seek the holyiest of grails

what is the air speed and volcity of an unlaided sallow

what do you mean african or european


err i dont know that





How do you know so much about swallows

well you have to knows theres things being a king

[I'm Jim Too]

Ah, Monty Python. The Knights who say "Ni" - yawn. The unlaiden swollow gag - passe.

Here in be genius:

After much squabbling Arthur sets about some peasants...

DENNIS:
I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!
ARTHUR:
Shut up, will you? Shut up!
DENNIS:
Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.
ARTHUR:
Shut up!
DENNIS:
Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm being repressed!

*Giggles*

[Scribbly]

'tis the best python movie.. and I love it.

It's only a model...
shh!

[spongmonkey]

Originally posted by eXtremer
ARTHUR:
Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home.
Let us ride... to... Camelot!

*the knights' song*

ARTHUR:
Well, on second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.


oh, and the Knight Who Say 'Ni' are just hilarious.
You missed out the bit when Patsy says 'its only a model'. hehehehehehehe. Seen that film about 20 times love every minute. realised just recently id seen it once 2 often. I watched it with the sound mute on and was able to shout every single line correctly at the tv.

' He who wishes to cross the bridge of death must answer me these questions three, there the other side he see.'Everyone I came across seemed to like Holy Grail but I just didn't find it all that funny

BLASPHEMY! A WITCH! A WITCH! BURN HER!

oh now i gotta quote another bit

' but what also burns?'

'MORE WITCHES!'

Dance weebl dance
:weebl: :weebl: :weebl: :weebl: :weebl: :weebl: :weebl:

[Boom Pie!]

Not forgetting... THE HOLY HAND GRENADE!!!

[dead]

i have to get out mr weebl for that one:

[Generic Student]

Thats a cool image

[dead]

i have one where it goes 1 2 5, but i lost it :(

[Pandaman]

"He bravely ran away away"

"I didn't!!"

Some classic stuff there...

[amr40]

he was not afriad to die in many nasty ways

hes buggerd off!!!

when danger reared its ugly head he gladly turned his tail and bravly fled when there is danger about he turned his head and chickend out he bravly ran away

oh yes he bravly ran away away
no i didnt!!!


also

let mee at em there only 150 of them

[plattbridger]

"Your mother was an 'amster and your father smelt of elderberries!"

"Now go away before I taunt you a second time"
"I blow my nose at you so-called 'Arthur King,' you and all your silly English Knnnnnnniggets."

:D The French lines are the best :D


"By what name do you go by oh mighty enchanterer?"
"There are those that call me... Tim..."

"And the Lord spoke, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out! Once the number three, being the third number be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thou foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.'"

"1, 2, 5"
"3, sir."
"3!" *lobs*

I could quote that film all day, and indeed I often do. Hoorah!

[oppernaR]

Bought the DVD, love it, every damn second!!!

How you English say, I one more time-a unclog my nose in
your direction, sons of a window-dresser! So, you think you could out-clever us French folk with your silly knees-bent running about in dancing behavior! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you heaving lot of second hand electric donkey bottom biters.

[dead]

opernaR, watch the extras! they rule ( i watched the film with teh follow the rabbt game thing on)

[sheep go moo]

"i am your king"
"no you are not"
"what are u then"
"i am french cant you tell from my enormous accent"
arhh it was and is a classic

[dead]

I order you to be quiet!
oooh, order eh, who does he thing he is?
well, i am your king!
well i didn't vote for you...
You don't vote for kings, you just get them
how did you become king then?
The lady of the lake, clad in the purest shimerring shalite, held aloft excalibur, showing that by divine providence, i arthur, was to be you king, that is why i'm your king!
listen, watery tarts, distributing swords is no basis for a system of government! supreme executive power........

[ShortFuse]

ARTHUR: Well, what is it you want?
HEAD KNIGHT: We want... a shrubbery!
[dramatic chord]
ARTHUR: A what?
HEAD KNIGHT: Nee! Nee!
ARTHUR and PARTY: Oh, ow!
ARTHUR: Please, please! No more! We shall find a shrubbery.

I loved that bit.. :D

So is it worth buying the DVD?...

[spongmonkey]

Whos that?
must Be a king
How can you tell?
He aint got shit all over him

Sorry its a while since i saw this thread so i felt compelled to quote.